Category: Post
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Inside Then Out
One of the most traumatic events in life is experiencing an American religious community from the inside and from the outside. I spent most of my life living, working, and ministering in the “Bible Belt,” the cultural and political epicenter of American evangelical Christianity. Still, I’ve been progressively branded a traitor to the faith during…
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Leaving America
Why did I leave? What was I looking for? How did I get the courage to give up all I knew for a place I had barely seen? Was it the desire to flee the division, turmoil, and seething anger—the racism, ageism, mass murders, and gun violence? Was it a need to escape the trauma…
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The Yes Within Ourselves
We have been raised to fear the yes within ourselves, to affirm our deepest cravings. The yes within has been educated out, churched out, spanked out, washed out, and combed out of our being. The heartbreaking truth of life is that we get farther away every year from the yes that was born within us….
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My Erotic Awakening (as an Eleven-Year-Old)
I am trying to remember how I discovered Robert Heinlein’s books. I may have picked them up while working as an aide in my public school library in the 5th or 6th grade or, more likely, at Goodwill, where Mom would take us to buy second-hand books. Thanks to a minister father, I was raised…
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My 15 Favorite Watercolors (out of 300+) and Why
I’ve completed over 300 paintings in two decades, an average of more than one per month. That does not include numerous sketches, graphite drawings, castings, artistic photographs, and three-dimensional art. Choosing favorites from creations that are all one’s “babies” is daunting. But here are my favorite fifteen watercolors and my interpretation, fully realizing yours may…
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Why This Non-Druggie Believes in Psychedelics
I have never been much for drugs of any kind: aspirin, decongestants, blood pressure medicine, cholesterol-lowering medicine, marijuana, or any other drug-type product. Perhaps this life-long aversion to medicine unconsciously comes from my old-time Pentecostal background that opposed medical directives and advocated divine healing provided in the atonement of Jesus. However, after seven decades of watching…
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Seven Months in Spain: A Totally Different Lifestyle
More people like us are choosing to immigrate to Spain because of the climate, the different pace of life, open-mindedness, and the availability of visas such as the non-lucrative visa and the digital nomad visa. Spain was recently voted the fourth-best country in the world for foreigners to live in. After seven months, we are…
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Ejaculation: What It Is and Why It Feels So Good
It’s best to imagine this post as an episode of John Oliver’s Last Week Tonight. It makes the title sing when imagined in his striking British accent, complete with hand and face gestures. He would very likely emphasize the last two words by slowing them down and adding the accented word “fucking” in the middle and slapping his palms…
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Loreena McKennitt In Concert (The Backstory)
Last night, Gina and I saw Loreena McKennitt for the first time in concert. I have loved her music for over thirty years, particularly her vocal clarity and quality. Afterward, I told Gina the backstory of the song The Mummer’s Dance, which helped her understand why I was so moved last night as the stunningly…
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There are Men Too Gentle to Live Among the Wolves
If you look up definitions of “virile,” you will find words like macho, ultramasculine, hairy-chested, vigorous, masterful, and forceful. And phrases like “having traditional masculine traits, especially to a marked degree.” Virility is “any of a wide range of masculine characteristics viewed positively.” Virile means “marked by strength or force.” I firmly believe that these…
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Protected: A Tribute to My Muse and Favorite Model
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
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Impromptu (and Candid) Thoughts
(A Four-Minute Read) I retired at the age of forty-eight. Which caused a few years of tumultuous adjustment—tears shed over this self-imposed exile from the stage; once applauded by audiences, admired by peers, and stopped by strangers in the street; how could I not feel some bereavement over the waning of my celebrity, the weekly…
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Museum of Prohibited Art
Warning: This post contains graphic images and explicit sexuality. At my first church staff position (a naive and easily manipulated nineteen-year-old) as youth and music pastor, I will never forget the ultra-authoritarian white male pastor ordering me to have a record burning of all the youth’s rock and roll albums. For some ignorant and unknown…
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Pleasure: Sinful Desire or A Pathway to Healing?
Could pleasure transcend its conventional definitions of “frivolous amusement,” “a state of gratification,” or “desire,” as the Merriam-Webster dictionary suggests? Might it hold a more profound significance? What if pleasure is a pathway to healing? Those of us brought up in a fundamentalist religious home may find this question challenging to contemplate. Pleasure, our preachers, teachers, and parents…
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Gentle Thoughts for Those of Us Over 40
—Do everything you can to cultivate an inner life, especially since culture is always trying to suck it out of you. —Try Meditation. Take 10 minutes in a quiet, private place. Set a timer and mentally recite and repeat “The Serenity Prayer,” or write your own mantra. When your mind strays, be kind to yourself…
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The Last Day of My Innocence
“I am other, no longer what I was before the affair of yesterday.” An idyllic Thursday in June 2006 was my last innocent evening. A friend and I strolled along the utopian Main Street of Franklin, Tennessee, and savored beer and oysters in the heart of the historic downtown. We discussed plans for my seventh…
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Candid Thoughts On My 66th Birthday
Sixty-six (sesenta y seis) seems weirdly unimportant in a beautiful way. Last year seems more momentous—I began Medicare and turned the official American retirement age, even though I had technically “retired” twenty years earlier. The Spanish word for retired—jubilado—is a wonderfully expressed word. The World Health Organization says age is one of the first…
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Protected: 66
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
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My Culture Survey (Spain Edition)
**I saw this survey in The Atlantic and loved it. I adapted it slightly. The upcoming event I’m most looking forward to: Visiting the Costa Brava of Spain. The sun-kissed land, a rugged coastline lined with pine-edged coves, golden untouched beaches, and crystal clear water. Its beauty extends inland with important Greco-Roman ruins, and quiet Medieval villages,…