We decided to get lost yesterday. I had read about the art of getting lost on a placard in the Museu d’Història de Barcelona. But I had never purposely gotten lost and wanted to try it. So we took the tram, then the metro to Liceu, and walked through Old Town to El Born, to one…

Spain does not celebrate Thanksgiving. It is a distinctively American experience. It is ironic that last year in America, Gina and I spent Thanksgiving alone at our home in Dunedin. However, Ray, our long-time friend (over three decades), and his partner Alan will be with us this year. We plan to gather around the table…

They are achingly beautiful, these romantic cities—Barcelona, Paris, Rome. The contours of Europe are far more mysterious and deeply layered than those of America. They are like the “promised land” I had always been told about but knew deep in my heart did not exist. It was like I had died and gone to heaven,…

There are times in life when leaving is the only healthy option. To leave is to go away from someone or something temporarily or permanently. So many people stay in abusive relationships (emotional and physical), falsely believing they have no option but to stay. Here are a few things I’ve left, and I am much…

One of my favorite memories is Dad building a crude sandbox for us children. It was constructed of ancient lumber and filled with soft, fine sand. We would play make-believe for hours and build golden sandcastles that would glisten in the sun, pretending to be brave knights like Sir Lancelot, wielding giant lances, saving fair…

No matter how we define ourselves, we often lack proof that there are others like us, which can be profoundly lonely. Scariest of all, we may begin to understand what it means to be someone who is set apart in some way: because of complexity, race, disability, or one of the dozen other ways society…

One of the most traumatic events in life is experiencing an American religious community from the inside and from the outside. I spent most of my life living, working, and ministering in the “Bible Belt,” the cultural and political epicenter of American evangelical Christianity. Still, I’ve been progressively branded a traitor to the faith during…

I have never been much for drugs of any kind: aspirin, decongestants, blood pressure medicine, cholesterol-lowering medicine, marijuana, or any other drug-type product. Perhaps this life-long aversion to medicine unconsciously comes from my old-time Pentecostal background that opposed medical directives and advocated divine healing provided in the atonement of Jesus.  However, after seven decades of watching…

Could pleasure transcend its conventional definitions of “frivolous amusement,” “a state of gratification,” or “desire,” as the Merriam-Webster dictionary suggests? Might it hold a more profound significance?  What if pleasure is a pathway to healing? Those of us brought up in a fundamentalist religious home may find this question challenging to contemplate. Pleasure, our preachers, teachers, and parents…

Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.  -Jean Claude Sartre I cannot think of anyone who has attained your degree of freedom—my long-time friend Ray commented on a recent post, Ever curious, I began to ponder that statement. People have called me a “free-spirit” all my life. I’ve found that it…

Note: Jeff Tweedy, frontman for Wilco, one of my favorite bands, recently published a memoir by the post title’s name, inspiring me to write this post.  1963—“Dear Jesus, Abide With Me,” as a five-year-old local celebrity child singer, this song was my standard. I sang it solo at my kindergarten graduation and many other churches,…

15-year-old Randy (1973)  What is most important to you now? High school marching band. Your biggest fear? Hell. Your favorite artist? Chicago Your favorite book? Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand Your favorite movie? I’m not allowed to go to the movies. What makes you happy in a relationship? Being together. Describe yourself in four words….